For twelve years, I have a bestfriend. We went to the same school way back in highschool. We’re always there for each other. When I had a problem with my mom, he was there. When his mom died, I was there. We were like twins, or even partners for some. We lived in the same roof for two years, and more often that not, our hookups or possible dates would ask, “Is that your boyfriend in that picture frame?” Well, that’s not gonna happen. We were like brothers by blood.
But it came to a point that this bestfriendship faded away. I was left out. I became just like an acquintance friend for him, which became so obvious in Puerto Galera. I was been replaced by someone as the bestfriend.
Well, we all have a freedom to be friends with everyone, isn’t it? Like me, I do have other friends. But I’ve managed to still show him the level of bestfriendship we have. But him, he wasn’t able to do that.
I moved out from our unit not because i don’t wanna live with him anymore, but I do have now responsibilities at home. I felt sad because of losing two things: an independent life and a bestfriend. The very first day he already had a new place, I can feel a wall between us. I don’t know but it happened.
And now, knowing that we’re not living together in the same roof, he would still rather choose to be with anyone, than me. I’d rather not have a bestfriend than to have one just by calling each other “Bes”. We also need to feel that straight from the heart. Forget the twelve years, it is pointless to hold on to it. If he doesn’t want me to be his bestfriend now, I can live with it. Not a pressure at all.
That’s life. In the end, you still need to take care of yourself. Just yourself.
The "Bestfriend"
i think you were not replaced. you were just being selfish. as you said, anyone can be friends with anyone. so i think your best friend is just reaching out with his other friends.
you in a way became dependent on your best friend. he can’t always be with you, be there for you, and help you all the time.
in reality, you did not lost your best buddy. you lost yourself.
Probably, I lost myself. But my main concern is, to be treated the same way as before and having other friends at the same time. I can do that, why can’t he?
Martin, it has been four years since I broke up with your bestfriend but this blog entry made me recall what he did to me…
“If he doesn’t want me to be his bestfriend now, I can live with it. Not a pressure at all.”
Back then, I could have easily translated it to: “If he doesn’t want me to be his BOYfriend now, I can live with it. Not a pressure at all.”
Let’s move on… 😀
Martin, it has been four years since I broke up with you bestfriend but this blog entry made me recall what he did to me. It’s just such a pity that your friendship has come to this… I could still recall how close you were to each other…
Anyway, let’s move on… 😀
you got jealous of him with other friends around maybe,and you felt left out…in a way you wanted it to be just you being that super close at him.
i got jealous of my friends din…
ei,omg.gosh talaga.i need to iba may style of sulat kc baka ma knowing hu ako,charot!masyado kc me closeta i mean close sa dalawa at ako ay saksi bente kwatro oras.
i disagree sa pagiging selfish si martin accornding to first commenter (such a word baklash)???.i believe kasama ng pagiging bestfriend ang isang responsibilidad o ang talagang ibig sabihn ng bestfriend ay natatangi ang pagmamahal na ipinakikita o ipanadarama, nakikita man ng iba at nde sa isang kaibigan sa nde lang matagal kundi sa subok nang mga pagkakataon , maliit man o malaki…syrempre dun na tayo sa malaki……sa ganitong aspeto mama eh bagsak sa tunay na kahulugan ng bestpren ang taong nasasakdal. Kung ikaw ay walang paki alam sa isang bespren,abah eh nde ka nya bespren,in facto, kung ikaw ay walang paki sa kaibigan eh nde ka kaibigan…simple lang…
yung mga punto na ang bespren mo eh kasama mo sa isang gimik at magpapa alam na may lakad na iba at sasama sa iba…, at nde ka iniimbita eh nde pang bespren at isang KABASTUSAN, walang modo, walang pinag aralan…isa itong PANG IIWAN sa ERE na matatawag…nde katanggap tanggap sa mata ng mga mapagmahal kong anghel de la guards…
wag natin hayaang itrato tayo ng LESS ng iba,(para pe kontodo best kung nde naman pala best, aahay naman)…sa iyong sitwasyon martina..tanong ko,ano klase sya bespren..knowing ko na alam ng lahat ng kaibigan mo ang sagot…kilala sya sa pagiging…ay, ayoko na…over na ito..lumalabas na may kinakampihan na akies…chaka naman ng talkies ko here…pero ang main event ko theng…iba ang ibig nya siguro ng bespren….maaring sa salita lang o palabas sa ibang tao para feeling goodie goodie sya?..charot!!!
naalala ko dati,nakita sya sa ibang lugar, kasi daw ayaw na muna nya ikaw o ang grupo nyo makasama…talagang nasa ugali nya ang man laglag..kaya wag ka na magtaka…..o ilaglag ka…hehehe…bulag ka lang…hahay.
sa mga nagbabasa, may bespren ba kayo? ano ang turing nya sa inyo? nde ba special ABOVE anybody, in facto, minsan, above kapamilya pa nga eh (go channel 2 ). ngayon kung natitiis ka ng taong yan at napapabayaan, o wala sya paki na nagsi sintemyento koa..aba aba aba at isa pang aba…AYOKO ng magka BESPREN! dun na lang ako sa mga ordinaryo kaibigan, nde NANG IIWAN!!!
babushki…kilala ko kayo pareho,nde ako galit sa bespren mo at nde kita kinakampihan..ang sinasabi ko lang..ganun ang ugali nya,nde pang bespren..nasa iyo na yan kung magpapa ka martir at papagamit ka or maging maligaya sa piling ng mga totoong tao, sa hirap at ginhawa,walang papaboran…AMEN..magsitayo ang lahat at pumalakpak…..*.*
and then dito naman ako…
it seemed that this year is not a so good year for old friends…bestfriends….well,i for one lost mine.
cant believe when i first heard that you two have issues,but then again, after hearing both sides, and reading postings here, may issue nga!…hehehehe
friendship is a two-way relationship.lets admit it,we call a person a friend because in some way he/she either help or give something to us, in any form and kind, be it physically, mentally, spiritually, financially, emotionally…..we get something…respect, love, attention, pleasure, comfort, confirmation, stability, balance…. friendship is RESPONSIBILITY…otherwise, youre just an acquaintant or simply ..ALA KWENTA..hehehehe..have a good day.
remember, before you became bestfriends, you have your own individual lives with other groups, other friends, other circles. and as the years passed, you create more networks and meet new friends, which might or might not be friends with your bestfriend.
seems to me that your relationship with your bestfriend was based from co-dependence. i am not a fan of that type of relationship.
that may be true, having other group, friends before…but thats why you have a bestfriend, these groups, friends , new and old, will come and go, but supposedly the bestfriend, should stick with you and you should stick with him…that is if he is worthy…otherwise, just like any other relationship…dont be taken for granted.nobody deserves less treatment specially from a bestfriend…..